Prayer is Not the Most Effective Way to Win a Football Game

The other day my pals and I were tossing around the old pig skin and, just before we broke huddle for the second half of our scrimmage, Friend#1 points his index finger toward the sky, nods knowingly, and crosses himself. I dismissed it at the time, but when we were exchanging post-game handshakes with the other side, a bitterness grew inside me. If Friend#1 had just taken that moment of silence to review the play we were running instead of making gestures, he would've been there for the pass and scored the touchdown to seal our victory.

Now, I should be fully honest from the start and disclose that I am an atheist. Despite this bias, I think I can state, unequivocally, that you win more games with skill than prayer. Yes, I'm a firm believer in scoring, for at least two reasons.

First, wasting time praying doesn't guarantee a win: If both sides pray to win, God can't simultaneously grant each side's prayers for victory. And if the number of people praying is weighted by the strength of their faith, then teams should have everyone praying really hard in order to persuade God over the opposing team. Racking up points just seems to be a better way of winning games than prayer. Next time you're playin' some hoops with the gang, feel free to throw in a hail mary or two, but remember that, when it comes down to it, a three-pointer is worth more.